These tiny creatures
crawls in my hair.
i don't know from where.
i suspect a friend who used my pillow
few years ago.

they suck and lick and
fuck in my head.
it was one,
and then 4
and many more now.
They deserve to die under my nails
crushed to death.

Slumber

 I stand in the shadow of the buildings waiting, waiting for him to come. It's been past 30 minutes since i'd been struggling to hold the complicated human-made metal through my slippery fingers. To put it inside the overcoat would have been a terrible risk to take. i kept waiting..................................................
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As i walked on the boulevard of music strings, i felt sick. it was moving.shaking.swinging and flowing smoothly. i jumped from on to another. but it was all the same. the same curves, the same twist, the same warp.



then i fell,

slowly

very slowly

till the abbys.

but,

there were more

deeper

and deeper

and deeper.

finally, i fell into a mass of oil, thick, black oil. i tried to breath but i couldn't. it began to ran, that mass of polluted oil. ran so fast with thousands of feet....ike a centipede. ran towards my nostril and slide down the throat to the stomach, and it dances there swriling around like the hindu god, shiva.







And it turned into a snake.yes, a snake. a cobra. wriggling out its tongue. flickering a million times. its tongue grew, rapidly. turn into fresh greenish buds of a creeper. a pumpkin, or a grapes. i dont know.

Price rise and Manipuri psyche

     The cause and effect of the price rise of the essential commodities is barely discussed formally and intellectually in public functions, seminars and media apart from gossips around the town in a personal level. People seem to be immuned to the price rise although they are aware of it. In fact, people are starting to consider this increased price as ‘normal’. Recently, the price of the fruits has been particularly increased tremendously, as much as double the price two years back. It’s probably as much the same case with other commodities too. Comparing with other states, its sky high. For instance, a kilo of grapes cost only Rs. 30 in Hyderabad while in our state, it goes as high as Rs. 240 per kilo. Imagine the difference! Most of the things, once it gets in Imphal, have a totally different price level. As long as they have not crossed the highways, the normal price remains somehow.

     There are two reasons which affect the price the most. Somewhat, it seems like these two are the only reasons. One of the two obvious reasons for the rise in price is apparently because of the illegal taxes forcefully made to pay to the traders on the highways while the goods are being transported from other states as we all know. Another is, ironically enough, created by the traders, by our own people, by ourselves. In the pretext of paying the taxes, without even giving a second thought , the owners of the goods which are being brought to the state increase the price to as much a level where they can safely lie to the customers. At a time when the price is already too high for the common people, it is indeed a sad story to tell that we continue to cheat each other every second when we get every sick opportunity.

     Rather than solving the current problem of paying the taxes on the highways together, some people are trying to make use of the problem assuming themselves very intelligent to make use of the problem when, in reality, we are practically jumping into a bigger mess in the process. It is high time that the concerned Authority looks into this open secret seriously and takes some effective actions.

    Having said this, I don’t really want to divert the processing mind from the core issue concerning the problem, illegal taxes. The so-called patriotic warriors, separatist and a few others who I have no clue what to call, are executing all sorts of illegal, undemocratic, criminal activities on the highways with zeal to its zenith. Worse, the government is turning a blind eye. Both the Central and the State Government who are responsible for the maintenance of the condition of the highways are competing each other in being silent as much possibly as they can about this unfortunate discourse. In fact, it looks like they all have some secret agenda where they are working together towards building a “better” nation. In the meantime, the common people, bereft of this knowledge, are innocently running along to the trend without diverting the course of the flow. If this really is the case, we can hardly see the bright future we so long to have. Isn’t it late enough for us to realize what should be done to change for better? Finding out the best of the solutions, the implications of this discourse, the impotency of making this happen, all must be given serious thought. 

5:51. april 17, 2012.

2010 was 2 years back. Dec was sweet.

not so simple me.

The more you think of it, the more you get disillussioned.
The other side of you rejoice while the other side loathes

An Army

     Its been almost 2 years since I haven't seen a person with uniform. All these years I never knew that the very word “army” terrifies me bad to the bone.
     Every morning, I saw pictures of armies and blood in the front page of all the four papers my dad subscribed. My mom would always scold us for not doing the morning chores but instead wasting the time reading the papers leisurely. Garlands of lies run all throughout the paper. Beads of words where horrible lies are embedded jumped up in front of my eyes whenever I read in the morning. It made my eyes hurt, more than the morning bright sun in a summer morning. There is also a column where they write down all the good deeds done by the army in Imphal Free Press. I never bother to read that. What's the point!
     At 7 in the night, there is the radio news. I wonder if they are still listening to it. I suppose they must be. My absence wouldn't make that much of a difference. And then the 9 o'clock news in the local channel, ISTV 1, which is repeated again at 10 o'clock in ISTV 2. Once, they showed the damped body of Lungnila Elizabeth pouring out from the yellowish sack, her leg spreading in a distorted oval shape. She was a girl of 8 who was being raped and killed by some unknown persons and left in a sack near a swamp.
     But they dint show the breast-less body of Manorama. I bet they did capture a video of it. We could have seen the flat chest she got after they cut her breast with whatever they used. I heard they took her inside the camp at Kangla. There is a place where they torture whoever they arrest without the memo, it seems. Like a darkroom. No, actually far more creepier than that. I was a kid then.
     Recently, everyone was talking about Rabina, only some 4, 5 years back. She was killed in an open fire by the commandos which was supposedly to be an encounter with the insurgents. The so called insurgent was a guy of around 25 who came to buy medicine for his sick father. He was in a revolutionary group years ago, as well as been surrendered years ago and trying to lead what you called a normal life. The woman's swelled stomach could be seen distinctly. It was looking rather beautiful just above the pink and black horizontal lines. Her 4 years old son was looking around with a clear shinny eyes beside her before the elder woman took him to her lap and tried to comfort.
     I didn't see this with my own eyes. I heard them. I saw in the pictures only. But I never knew I could be scared just at the mention of the word “army”.
    Me and Pamir has been selling the university t shirt for a month now. I cant even sleep properly. They just keep knocking the door. And some of them doesn't have that much sense that they should take off their footwear while coming inside. It pisses me off.
     Today, I was taking a nap just after the class when the Nokia ring tone suddenly started. I forgot to change it to Norwegian wood. I cut the call. Again it rang, I was frustrated. It turned out to be a guy with a very irritating voice. His words sounded like a forwarded video. I couldn't make out anything except that he is someone who wants to take the t shirt. He came to the room after sometime.
    When I opened the door I realized that his voice doesn't suit the face at all. He asked me to give him one more extra shirt which he dint order. We didn't have any. I was looking for his name in the list of people who ordered when he starting blabbering about himself. I came to know he is an army and they are sponsoring the PGDTC courses in our university. The sound of A ,R, M ,Y together clicked and gave me the creeps. Ice down my spine. I lost consciousness. I couldn't apprehend what was happening. But I was standing and talking to this man. He offered me to let me buy things in cheap prices from the canteen.
    The next minute, he was gone along with two extra t shirts. I gained consciousness and found out I am psychologically affected and a weakness added.